P to the U to the N to the C to the H

Lot of times, when I am depressed by the amount of times the MRF Blimp comes on air and commentators go: "that's the MRF Blimp", I wonder at things that have no connection to it. One such unconnected thing is the "punch" phenomena in Tamil cinema.

If you know that part of the world, they take their movies seriously. Very, actually. It is mandatory to have been associated with cinema to be able to become chief minister of the state. Even for mere mortals your status is defined by how many times you have been on Visu's Arrattai Arangam (a show where you have to speak loudly and end every sentence with a "saaaaaaar"), whether you can chronologically list Radhika's various TV serials or you have at least subscribed to #TR.

Now you know. Anyway, the "punch" is a strange art which is believed to have influenced even the Holy One: Gunda. It happened more with Rajnikanth movies where he rendered a couplet or a quadruplet every few minutes so as to invoke the global callback function called PaisaVasool(). I am not aware of when it all started, but I remember this from Arunachalam (which, you'd be surprised, has nothing to do with the north-east of India).

Aandavan Solraan

Arunachalon Mudikkaran

Arthaath, God proposes, man disposes... in fact, in this case, Man disposes.

A couple of years later, in Padaiyappa, he went blazing with his punch.

Yen vazhi, thaniiiiiiiiiiiiii vazhi.

My route, differennnnnnnnnnnnt route.

Adhigama aasepadra aambleyun,

adhigama kovapadra pombleyun,

nalla vazhndada saritrame kadayaadu.

Meaning, there has never been a history of someone like Lalit Modi and Lalit Modi (if he was a woman) living happily.

Hey, how could I forget Basha, which started it all I guess.

Naa orudarave sonna,

nooru darave sonna maadri.

Meaning, my one Tweet can go up to 14000 characters.

This Punch thingy reached magical heights in his big film, Baba. As if forecasting its box-office life he says:

Gatham, gatham!

What's gone, is gone.

Anyway, the basic idea of this post was to supply free Punches for him. But there is only one Superstar. So maybe the wannabes can use it if they want. Here goes:

1. Naa tightukku loosu,

Paambukku mongoosu.

Do you really want a translation, 60% of the words are in English.

2. Vaayile pallu

Nenjile kallu

Udambellan dillu

Yemperenna sollu?

In mouth, teeth. In heart, stone. In body, guts ya. Tell what my name is.

3. Ramya Krishnan kudukkaradu thangon

Africale irukku Congo,

Golu vetchirukkon vaango,

Naa adichcha unakku veeeeeeeengon.

This actually doesn't make much sense and it's also heavily-laden with local references, but you do remember Ramya Krishnan from Parampara, no?

I will stop here as I need to conjure more Blimp jokes in the meantime. Till next time:

Shoe-vukku Bata,

Blimpukku tata,

for the time being, vatthhaaa!